I wish I could tell you that confessing your feelings to your crush is as easy as saying something like, “Hi, I’m X and I like you. Do you want to hang out sometime?”
While such a direct approach could work in some situations, it comes with risks. You’d be basically putting yourself out there without having a clue about how they’d respond.
On top of that, if they don’t know you well or at all, they’ll have to base their decision on the first impression you give them.
I think you agree that’s too much pressure on both of you. Well… that’s why I recommend easing them into it.
In this way, you will also have the chance to get to know them better and determine whether you’d be a good match.
How? As follows, you’ll find 11 tips to help you confess your feelings to your crush.
Let’s jump right in!
Here’s How to Tell Your Crush How You Feel:
Part A: Setting Up The Stage Before Confessing
1. Help them notice you by hanging out with their friends
Your crush could be someone from school, work, or another place you frequently go to. Maybe you’ve seen each other many times, but you weren’t introduced properly.
If that’s the case, then you must do something to change that. You should focus on making a move towards establishing some sort of connection with them.
In case they are someone from school, you definitely have mutual friends and/or acquaintances. So, to get closer to them, all you have to do is to start hanging out more with their close friends.
At this point, you can keep your motives hidden. Your schoolmates/coworkers don’t have to know you’re crushing on this person.
But what if your love interest is someone from the gym, a place where you volunteer, and so on?
If that’s the case, then you can no longer rely on mutual friends/acquaintances. You’ll have to find another way to get inside their circle and make your crush notice you.
As soon as you’re in, don’t hesitate to introduce yourself or ask someone else to introduce you. Make small talk and crack a joke or two if you’re not nervous.
2. Ask your crush questions to get to know them better
Asking someone questions in a casual way is an inoffensive way to get to know them better.
After you become more familiarized with each other by hanging out in groups, or during lunch breaks at work or school, you can go ahead and express your interest in them. How?
- Ask them open-ended questions
- Pick casual topics such as hobbies
- Try to find common ground with them
You can ask them anything you want. However, if you don’t want to give them a clue that you like them from the beginning, refrain from inquiring things like, “Are you single?”
Knowing whether they’re in a relationship is indeed very important for you. But if you don’t want to come on too strong from the beginning, then a better idea would be to connect with them on social media.
By doing so, you can see for yourself if they’re coupled and also learn more valuable information about them.
3. Know About Your Crush’s Feeling For You
Spending some time with your love interest goes a long way. You have the chance to observe their behavior around you and around others.
Basically, you must look for signs they like you and analyze the way you two interact with each other.
Body language signs:
- They make eye contact with you
- They smile when they see you
- They point their feet at you while talking
- They lean in slightly during a conversation
- They don’t keep their arms or legs crossed
- They remove objects positioned between you two
- They tilt their head when you talk
- They touch you lightly from time to time
As for verbal cues, if they like you, they might say your name a lot, use some of your usual phrases, and talk in a higher tone if they’re a woman or a deeper tone if they’re a man.
Part B: Confessing Your Feelings To Your Crush
4. Drop Some Hints That You Like Them
Look, before you tell this person that you’re into them, you could try to show them.
Flirting is a great way to signal to someone that you like them. To be more precise, if you’re a girl, then you could make eye contact with him more and smile when you do.
You can subtly lick your lips when he’s talking to you, play with your hair, and lean in a bit to show interest and some cleavage.
Don’t underestimate the power of touch either: Push him gently when he makes you laugh or touch his thigh to get his attention.
If you’re a guy, then you can also make prolonged eye contact with her or make sure she catches you when you look at her.
Nod and tilt your head when she’s talking to show her you’re interested in what she’s saying. Ask her questions, make jokes, and enhance your chemistry!
5. Think about what you want to say to them
At this point, you and your love interest should already be accustomed to each other, even if it’s for a little bit.
So, it’s time to think about what you’d say to him or her. In this regard, you don’t have to write a lengthy script and then recite it to them.
On the contrary. The best way would be to tell them how you feel as naturally as possible. Don’t think about using complicated words or making a list of reasons why you like them.
Direct, clear communication is the key here.
Let me give you some examples:
“Hey, look at the clock! It’s confession hour. I enjoyed our brief talks lately. I think you’re very sweet and I like you a lot.”
As a response to them making you laugh: “You’re so funny! You see, I like you for a while now and the fact that you’re funny is definitely a bonus. Are you free on Friday?”
6. Find the right time and place to confess your feelings
When you’re ready to confess your feelings to your crush one on one, think about a time and a place.
It goes without saying that you should have this conversation in private.
You don’t want your schoolmates, coworkers, or other people to be present when you pour your heart out to someone. That can turn out to be a little embarrassing, especially if your crush rejects you.
So, do your best to catch them alone in a comfortable and calm setting.
For example, if they’re in a rush to catch a bus, wait a bit longer – that would not be a good time to confess.
However, if you two meet in between classes or during a lunch break, or even after school/work, you can approach your love interest then.
Remember: Cut to the chase and keep it short and sweet!
7. Confessing Your Feelings Directly & Indirectly
To confess your romantic feelings for someone, you can opt for a face-to-face conversation or write them a love note.
Each method comes with its pros and cons. Even so, the preferred one is to approach your love interest directly.
Write a love note or make a cute card for your crush. On it, write something short, simple, and sweet. As I said before, you don’t need an elaborate text to do the trick.
Then, hand it to them, or leave it somewhere you know for sure they’ll find it.
Examples are: in their locker room, on their desk, and so on.
As for confessing face to face, you already know what to do. Get them somewhere private, smile, and tell them how you feel.
You can’t go wrong with a short and light approach. Remember to formulate your confession in a way that puts no pressure on him or her.
8. Letting Your Crush Know Through Friends
Another way to get on your crush’s radar without doing anything directly is to ask for a mutual friend’s help. This works even if you’re not really good friends with someone.
What you need to do is simply tell them about your feelings for this person and then wait for them to spread the rumor. Or, you can ask them to tell others.
By doing so, your crush will find out you like them from others. If this happens, he or she will have time to decide what to do next without feeling pressured.
They could choose to approach you and tell you they like you back. If that’s the case, you won’t even have to confess your feelings for them.
Or, they might do nothing. Does that mean they don’t like you? Not necessarily!
He or she might be waiting for you to make a move, they might be too shy to approach you themselves, and so on.
9. Ask your crush out on a real date
Here’s another one of your alternatives: Ask your crush out on a real date.
Let’s say you and your love interest are already familiarized with each other. They’ve shown you signs of interest, so you’re not clueless about how they feel.
If that’s true, then you could ask them out on a real date. You can do this in person, via text, phone, or even send them a message on social media.
Choose the communication channel that you normally use to talk to them, it will help you to stay calm.
- Ask them out on a movie date. Find out what kind of movies they like and ask them out!
- Ask them out for dinner. Find out what their favorite food is and ask them out to a restaurant!
- Go to a party/concert together. If you have similar taste in music, you could ask them to accompany you.
10. Confidently confess your feelings for them
To make sure your love interest clearly understands you like them in a romantic way, it might not be enough to flirt with them or do things together to increase intimacy.
Instead, you might have to choose the hard way and confess your feelings for them. If you really have to do that, then do it with confidence!
The secret is to use “I” statements and to put zero pressure on them, as follows:
“I have a confession to make: I like you and I think about you a lot. I’d like to get to know you better if you’d like that, too.”
“I noticed you around and I think you’re very sweet. I’d like to spend some time alone with you whenever you’re free.”
“This may come across as a surprise but I’ve got a little crush on you.”
11. Be ready for a positive and a negative answer
After you tell your crush what you feel, you can expect 3 different outcomes. They might say that they reciprocate your feelings, reject you, or give you an ambiguous answer.
Let’s take them one by one:
Your crush likes you: In case they give you a positive answer, don’t hesitate to show them you’re happy about it. To continue, go on dates and focus on clear communication.
Your crush rejects you: Keep your chin up if they reject you! Thank them for being honest with you and don’t be dramatic. To move forward, focus on healing and accept that things were not meant to be.
Your crush is ambiguous: As a response to your confession, they might not give you a clear answer. They might not say anything at all, or give you mixed messages. If that happens, do your best to clarify the situation and respect your crush’s feelings.
Navigating Further (Summary)
By now you should have a better idea about how to tell your crush how you feel without making things awkward. There is more than one way to make your feelings known to this person.
Depending on how well you know each other and your confidence level, you could either ask them out and tell them how you feel, or spend more time with them in groups and send them a love note.
Adapt your confession to your personal style and be prepared for every possible outcome. You’ve got this!