Is She The One For You? 17 Common Signs

When you’re falling for an extraordinary woman, it’s tempting to assume she must be “the one.”

The excitement of new love makes it easy to ignore doubts and rationalize red flags. But the stakes are too high for rushed decisions in romance.

Studies show unhealthy relationships can profoundly damage well-being and satisfaction over the long-term.

That’s why it’s important to approach commitment with eyes wide open, not seen through rose-colored glasses.

In this article, we’ll be sharing 17 signs that confirm that she’s either the one or she isn’t.

We’ll take a look at what your gut feeling is telling you, whether or not there truly is chemistry between the two of you, and how important it is that you resolve arguments peacefully. 

17 Signs To Know That She Is The One For You

1. You got The Gut Feeling

Listen to your gut – what is it saying to you? 

The easiest way to listen to your gut is to imagine what life will be like with her and what it will be like without her.

How does it feel either way? 

Maybe you get butterflies when you picture a life together with her. Or maybe you start to feel nauseous whenever you picture a life without her.

How you feel physically when you think about her can go a long way to telling you whether she’s the one for you. 

2. She Is Really Into You!

I’m sure we’ve all had one-way relationships. Either we’ve been way more into them than they’ve been into us or vice-versa.

You know how it goes – you say to her “I miss you,” and she answers with “aww that’s sweet.”

It isn’t the same as “I miss you too!” 

On the other hand, if your girl is giving you everything right now – compliments, her time and her conversation – it’s a strong sign that she’s as committed to making it a meaningful relationship.

3. You Can Be Yourself Around Her

Picture the situation: You’ve gone to visit your girl at her house.

And while you’re excited about seeing her, you feel as though you can’t relax around her. You’re worried about saying something out of place or making a mistake, such as asking her the wrong thing. 

Now picture another situation: You’ve visited your girl at her house and everything feels natural.

From the way you greet her at the door, putting your arms around her and kissing her, to the way you feel as though you can freely be yourself in her house. 

You’re able to say what you want, act the way you want. You can make goofy noises and silly jokes. 

You can be yourself! 

The first example above is a warning sign to proceed with caution. If you can’t relax around your girl, she might not be for you. 

4. The Physical Chemistry Is Off The Charts

Sometimes, two people are in perfect harmony physically. You lean in for a kiss, she is ready to submit.

She leans in for a kiss and you are ready to submit. 

And when you kiss her, it’s the best kiss you’ve ever had. 

Even when the two of you are just talking, you feel something stirring within you – you just want to take her in your arms, to sleep with her and to wake up with her lying by your side, her breath on your face. 

Physical chemistry is extremely important for the success of any healthy relationship.

If she turns you on more than any other girl ever has, and if she knows exactly what you want in the bedroom and is willing to satisfy your needs, this is a sign she is the one for you. 

5. You Two Have Common Interests

What does it mean when a girl “gets” you?

It means that she finishes your sentences off. It means that she laughs at your jokes.

It means she shares your love of life, as well as your dreams, your goals and your ambitions. You go to parties together and everyone can see that the two of you just “click.” 

This demonstrates that you have great chemistry, which is key to a happy relationship. The more the two of you harmonise, the less conflict there’ll be.

This goes hand-in-hand with your goals and overall direction in life. If you want the same things, if you have the same drive and ambition to succeed, it means you can work together rather than working apart. 

Each week, you can plan your goals together and help each other grow. 

And when you have similar goals, there’ll be fewer arguments about your future plans, including where the two of you might live, as well as how you’ll spend your time in terms of your work-life balance.

6. She is Your Cheerleader

They often say that a partner is there to complete us.

Sometimes, they’re there to make us.

If you’ve been feeling uninspired in life lately, and if you’re miles off your goals, it’s your woman’s duty to give you the ass-kicking you need!

A girl who loves you deeply will tell you what you need to hear. She isn’t going to settle for a half-baked version of you – she wants the BEST version of you.

To that end, she is your biggest cheerleader and supporter. She pushes you forward so that you challenge yourself, test yourself and be the leader and the man she wants (and needs) you to be!

If she acts likes this it’s a good sign she’s the one.

7. She Is Also Your Best Friend 

If you’ve been dating a girl for a while but you feel that Joey (who is addicted to Call of Duty and sports) is still your best buddy, I’ve got news for you: This girl isn’t the one

Physical attraction is absolutely necessary when it comes to dating. It’s also essential for long-term relationships and marriage.

But when it comes to being in a long-term relationship or marriage, she also needs to be your friend.

While your old buddies can still be part of the picture, it is she who must be the one who has your best interests at heart now. She’s the one you can have sex with, laugh with, share fears and worries with.

She’s the one who will encourage you, fight for you and give you the pep talk you need. 

She is the complete person – your lover, your friend and the one you want to grow old with. 

8. The Arguments Don’t Get Ugly 

There are two ways to look at this.

If your girlfriend says to you that arguments are bad and that you should do all you can to avoid them, she isn’t the one. 

Arguments are necessary for growth. They help couples to settle disputes and move forward together. 

At the same time, arguments that turn ugly are also bad news. It demonstrates that either she isn’t listening to you (or vice-versa) and it creates a toxic atmosphere that doesn’t allow for growth. 

If the two of you are able to settle arguments peacefully without throwing insults, it’s a good sign. 

It’s even better if you emerge from an argument feeling as though you’ve instigated a positive change in your relationship and that you understand her more than ever now. 

9. She Embraces Your Vulnerability With Empathy

Guys – as much as they might not like to admit it – aren’t hard. They’re soft.

Guys have just as many vulnerabilities as a woman, which is why it’s so important that you’re with someone you can open your heart to.

Instead of laughing at your issues, she takes time to understand them. She offers you help, sympathy and encouragement.

So much so that you feel as though you can talk to her about anything. She takes your hand in hers, listens to you, doesn’t interrupt but gives you time to figure things out.

She is there for you. 

10. She is Honest and Committed to Integrity 

Honestly and integrity are the core values of any relationship.

What is integrity?

It’s when a person sticks to their values – which in a relationship should mirror yours – no matter what. 

For example, your girl doesn’t spread malicious gossip about her friends. She never tells lies but is always upfront about everything.

And if you ever suggest cutting corners or doing something that compromises her (or your) morals, she pulls you up. 

No, we’re going to do this the right way.

She leads with her commitment to integrity – and it’s breathtaking. 

11. She is in Your List of Top Priorities 

You kinda know when a girl is the one when she enters your list of top priorities.

Have you found recently that your list of priorities has changed, perhaps? 

Instead of running off to the bar as soon as a buddy asks you, you ask your girl to see what she’s doing tonight first. If she’s available, you’d rather spend the time with her. 

When the weekend is approaching, she pops into your head. What is she up to and perhaps the two of you can do something together?

The higher up your list of priorities she climbs, the more serious this relationship is. You might not have planned this to happen – but here she is. 

12. She Actively Plans a Life Together With You

Instead of saying vague things like “maybe we could do that sometime,” or “that could work,” she is specific with the things she wants to do with you. 

She not only suggests actual dates on the calendar that you could pencil things in on – she also makes arrangements so that things actually happen. 

She books trips, works out a budget and comes up with realistic plans. 

This doesn’t just go for “date nights” or weekend activities – it goes for life-changing events, such as finding a way of living together and mapping out the future. This shows her commitment to you and is a good sign that she’s the one. 

13. She Doesn’t Try to Tame You 

Have you ever dated a woman who looks at you as though there’s something a bit wrong with you if you show her too much passion? 

Maybe she told you to calm down or that “there’s no need to get so worked up.

In other words, she tried to tame the real you.

When a woman is the love of our life, she won’t do this.

Instead, she’ll make sure that you feel safe showing your vulnerable side to her. She’ll let you be you in front of her and will even encourage you to bare your teeth from time to time! 

14. She Gets Along Well With Your Family and Friends 

Imagine a situation where you’re not sure about her. You think she’s cool – but is she really the one for you? 

Now imagine that you introduce her to your family and friends and they all tell you how amazing she is.

  • “She’s too good for you!”
  • “Don’t let this one go!”

If your friends and family members are even more certain about her than you are, it’s a huge deal.

It shows that they’re able to see her as she really is – free from judgment and prejudice – and can see how this woman over all others is absolutely perfect for you.

If everyone agrees on this, it’s time to listen to them. 

15. She’s a Stable and Consistent Partner

If you’re looking to settle down with a woman, it’s essential that she provides stability and consistency. 

This means that you can count on her when you need her. When you phone her, she either answers straight away or she calls you back as soon as she gets the chance. 

It also means she’s emotionally stable. 

Yes, she’ll have bad moods like we all do. But her mood swings aren’t volatile and don’t impact your relationship.

Instead, you largely know what you’re going to get from her each day in terms of her temperament. And whenever she is feeling “off,” she makes sure to tell you and let you know why. 

16. The Thought of Marrying Her Doesn’t Scare You 

When you picture yourself getting married to her, how does it make you feel?

Do you feel anxious, afraid and unsure? 

Or do you feel excited by the prospect of walking down the aisle and saying “I do” to her? Can you imagine this being the happiest day of your life? 

17. She is the One You Turn to to Share Your Stories

Whenever something has happened to you, big or small, it’s always better when there’s someone to share it with.

You want them to laugh with you, smile with you – and maybe even sympathise with you.

Out of everyone, she is always the one you share these stories with. You want her to hear about your day at work, your plans with friends, as well as any funny things that have happened to you recently.

If you find that you seem to share literally everything with her, it’s a sign she’s the one.


So these were all the signs she’s the one. If you’ve been through initial stages of your relationship but feel excited that one day she could be your wife then you already know your answer.

How you feel about marrying her will go a long way to determining whether she is the one or not.

If everything else we’ve discussed in this article, including her commitment to honesty and integrity, as well as how she motivates you to be the best you can be, has fallen into place, it should mean that the thought of marrying her makes you feel amazing. 

About Will Titterington

Will Titterington is a highly sought-after relationship coach and author, with a passion for helping individuals and couples build and maintain healthy, thriving relationships. Will loves connecting with new people from all around the world and is always up for a good laugh, and takes joy in making others smile.

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