11+ Ways to Make Your Ex Jealous & Want You Back

Break ups are hard. They’re ugly and messy, and they make us experience countless negative emotions that bring out the worst in us. 

The lingering feelings of a past relationship are sometimes so intense that they can determine us to act in unhealthy and immature ways.

Like what? Making our exes jealous, of course! That’s something we are all more or less inclined to do after a break up.

Especially if we think we’ve been mistreated, played with, and/or betrayed, the idea of getting even with them or retaliating – one way or the other – sounds very appealing. 

That’s why I want to assure you that I won’t judge you for wanting to make your ex jealous. They probably deserve it!

What Should You Avoid While Trying to Make Your Ex Feel Jealous?

But if you really want to go down that road, a word of caution: Try not to get others involved in your drama. To be more precise, avoid dating other people just to make your ex realize what they’ve lost. 

No one is going to blame you if you casually see other people and focus on having fun. However, if you get tangled in a new relationship, that could cause complications. 


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On the one hand, it might lower your chances of getting back together with him or her. You may not want that now, but this doesn’t mean that you won’t change your mind. 

On the other hand, you might get yourself into another complicated situation. I am talking about one that involves mixed feelings, a sort of love triangle that should be avoided.

That being said, I am happy to share with you 12 efficient ways to make your ex jealous. Are you ready to take action? Let’s begin!

11+ Ways to Make Your Ex Jealous:

1. Start living your best life

To make your ex jealous you need to show them you’re unfazed, unbothered by the break up. It will be your best revenge.

Here’s the thing: People who live life on their own terms and explore their full potential are highly desirable. 

If you manage to show them what they’re missing out on, you might get a powerful response.

How? Start living your best life! Do this for yourself and others (including your former partner) will react accordingly. 

Simply put, when you start focusing on yourself, your well-being, and your personal improvement, you’ll naturally become more attractive to others. 

And when that happens, your ex will notice and they will feel extremely jealous.

2. Post eye-catching photos

Do you want to strike your ex-partner with jealousy and leave them smitten at the same time? Then remind them how good-looking and physically appealing you really are.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a guy or a girl. This trick works because they’ll think you are handling the break up wonderfully. 

They won’t assume you’re feeling miserable if you look especially alluring every time they see a photo of you. 

Want to go the extra mile? If you really want to get under your ex’s skin, try to deceive them and share photos of you and other people (someone they’ll see as a potential partner for you).

For example, if they’ve always been jealous of a coworker, you can’t go wrong if you take a friendly photo of yourself and that person. 

A mysterious man or woman works as well! Your ex won’t be able to stop wondering who that person really is. They might even start obsessing over it.

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3. Work on improving your body

As I was saying at #1, working on yourself and improving yourself is a big part of making ex jealous.

Your aim here is to make them see someone they want, but can’t have; someone who was theirs, but no longer is.

One of the most obvious and healthy ways to do it is by being an active person who exercises frequently and watches their diet.

Look, I’m not telling you to go on a diet. Transforming your body for the wrong reasons, such as your ex jealous, is not recommended. 

I’m suggesting making small changes in your routine so that you get in a good shape. Maybe you’ve heard of the amazing benefits working out can have on your body and mind. 

A person who exercises regularly isn’t only better looking and healthier, but they are also happier and have good self esteem.

4. Embrace the “no contact” rule

The “no contact” rule is a popular “get your ex-back” technique. So, if you’re also planning on getting him or her back after making your ex jealous, read on!

What do you have to do? The rule is pretty self-explanatory: Don’t initiate contact with them (for a few weeks) and also don’t respond to their attempts either.

I know… it’s easier said than done. Especially if you feel heartbroken right now and you somehow deal with the pain by seeking revenge, the last thing you want is NOT talking to them.

You might even ask yourself, “Won’t this help him/her move on faster?” Trust me, the “no contact” rule is meant to do just the opposite. 

It works because we are built in a strange way that determines us to want something/someone more just because we think we can’t have them/it.

If you ignore your ex, they’ll be even more curious about how you’re feeling and how you’re dealing with the break up. 

He or she will imagine all sorts of scenarios that will make them go through feelings of bitterness and envy.

5. Make them wait for a reaction

In case you can’t use the “no contact” rule with your ex because of various serious reasons, but you still want to make your ex jealous, then here’s what you should do:

  • Take your time to reply to their calls/texts/DMs.
  • Don’t treat them as if they are still a priority.
  • Answer using a neutral tone and stick to the point.
  • Don’t reveal your real emotions to them.
  • Make it look as if you don’t care about them.
  • Keep yourself busy for real and give them no importance.

By doing so, you’ll make your ex jealous of you.

They’ll wonder: How come you’re doing good and they’re not? What/who keeps you busy all of a sudden?

Appearances matter, especially in your quest. But if you do this for real, you’ll kill two birds with one stone: you’ll actually move on and live a more fulfilling life, and you’ll also make them regret losing you.

6. Don’t engage with their SM content

Do you know that saying, “no answer is also an answer”? If you do, then you must agree that the same goes for, “no reaction is also a reaction.”

Engaging with your ex’s social media content is a definite no-no because of multiple reasons, such as:

  • They might be provoking you with their posts and you don’t even realize it.
  • Their posts could be meant to trigger various feelings inside you.
  • Any reaction from you would mean that you still care about him/her.
  • He or she will think you are not over them and still look at their posts.
  • They might try to manipulate you and stop you from moving on.
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Your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend could have a hidden agenda as well.

So, do your best not to let your own intentions blind you. 

7. Spend time with your mutual friends

The simple fact that you go out with friends and have a good time with them has the potential to make your ex jealous.

How so? Until not long ago, you two used to have fun together. But now that’s no longer possible because you’re not together anymore.

Instead, you seem to have an amazing time without them. You spend time with your friends doing various activities and even visiting new places.

You can even take it a notch up by hanging out with that “just a friend” friend or with a completely new friend of opposite sex.

They will also be left wondering if you already had interest in this new person and it will drive them crazy.

Overall, It’s fantastic way to make your ex jealous and feel like they’re missing out. Since they’re probably not doing the same, jealousy will creep in.

Want to make sure he or she finds out about every little adventure you have? Post photos! 

Even if you’re not friends anymore on Facebook or follow each other on Insta, you can still see each other’s posts due to having mutual acquaintances.

8. Take a new person out on a date

Are you still really mad at your ex and you’re looking for a way to hit them below the belt? I’ve got you covered!


  • Write down all the special places where you used to go with your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend.
  • Choose one or more meaningful places and then move on to the next step.
  • Think about who you could go there with – play it safe and go with someone you know, but they don’t.
  • Take pictures, or… it didn’t happen. Pose with that attractive person you go out with.
  • Post the pics on Insta or some other SM platform where you think they’ll see them.

But before you do this, I urge you to reconsider: Are you really that type of person who purposely hurts someone?

I don’t know what happened between two of you… Even so, I think it’s safe to assume that whatever they did, they didn’t do it on purpose.

9. Follow the people they already follow on Insta

Since your online activity might not be as visible to them as it was before due to the fact that you unfollowed each other (like on Instagram), you have to do something about it.

If they can’t see your posts and pics, then your efforts could be in vain. To make sure that doesn’t happen, you should follow the people he already follows on Insta.

The more you engage with their content and the other way around, the better. But wait, there’s more!

If you do this, you’ll basically make your presence felt all around him. He won’t be able to scroll through in peace because, at some point, your activity will show up. 

Reading your flirty comments to other people’s posts and their comments to yours will most probably make your ex jealous as hell.

10. Be nice to them and their friends

Let’s say that you can’t avoid seeing them and/or their friends. What do you do?

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If you want to achieve your goal, you have to act as if you don’t care, as if you’ve moved on, and as if you’re doing great. 

Your overall attitude is advisable to be friendly. Why? Your ex expects you to do just the opposite.

They expect you to treat them badly, with anger and resentment. Moreover, they expect you NOT to keep it civil and lash out at them.

So… DON’T. You have an ace up your sleeve and that’s the element of surprise. Surprise them with a kind attitude, make small talk, and don’t go into personal details.

Do the same with their friends and your common friends. Don’t avoid meeting them. Otherwise, they’ll think you’re stuck at home, pining for him or her.

11. Become a more upbeat person

How dedicated are you to making your ex jealous? If you want to make an extra effort, there’s something you could do: Become a more upbeat person.

What does this really mean? Among others, it means to…

… have a positive way of thinking.

… adopt more healthy habits.

… don’t sweat over the small things.

… practice gratitude and appreciate the good.

If you manage to do all of the above, he or she won’t believe how much you’ve changed. They’ll feel compelled to ask themselves how you did it… Jealous much?

12. Subtly flirt with others when they see you

What if you end up together in the same room/at the same party? 

If this happens, that’s an amazing opportunity. They’ll feel how jealousy creeps in when they’ll see you enjoying yourself, having the time of your life, laughing, and flirting with others.

That’s when they’ll reconsider the breakup and feel as if they’ve lost an irreplaceable partner. That’s also when they’ll feel insecure and a lot less attractive than anyone else there.

Belittling feelings will overwhelm them to the point when they’ll either leave, make a scene, beg for your forgiveness, or they’ll do something completely surprising. 

You never know what will happen until it happens.

Should you make your ex jealous?

Personally, I think that hurting a person just for the sake of hurting them is a shallow and pointless thing. Even if they messed up badly with you and made you feel miserable, they’re still not worth the effort.

Just because you make their heart sting a little, it doesn’t mean your pain gets less intense. However, if it’s part of some elaborate plan to get them back, I encourage it. 

If you do it out of love and to teach them a lesson, striking someone with jealousy is not that bad. 

Especially if it’s meant to make them realize their mistakes, such a strategy is not completely unethical. Sometimes, we have to learn things the hard way. But, the golden rule is to not get caught up in playing games for far too long.

Navigating Forward

Making your jealous is possible. You just have to fake it until you make it! 

Or, you can make a conscious decision to improve your life and yourself for your own happiness (not just to make your ex jealous).

Either way, if you try the steps above, your success is guaranteed! 

What will you do next, though? Let’s say they’re a bit jealous, so what now? 

Make sure you have a plan for what happens after as well. Whatever you do, don’t lose your upper hand!

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Daniela Duca Damian
About Daniela Duca Damian

A journalist by profession, Daniela has been sharing her knowledge and personal experience in the psychology of love and relationships for the past 5 years. Her work is based on facts, practical advice and is meant to help everyone achieve their romantic goals. When she isn’t writing, she challenges her friends with meaningful questions about life.

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