Getting dumped is one of the worst things that can happen in your love life. It affects you both physically and emotionally.
The feeling of loss and the void left inside you can eat you up if you’re not dealing with the situation properly.
But, you already know that and you might be wondering whether your ex feels even the slightest regret for deciding to split ways with you.
So, let’s look at your burning question first:
Do dumpers regret breaking up with their ex?
Dumper’s regret is quite common actually. Especially if your ex broke things off with you impulsively, they might regret it already.
“I had difficulty communicating and instead of bringing up my issues, I broke up with her. I miss her every day and tried to fix things for over 2 months now. I regret it every day,” says Gnarley131 on Reddit.
Could your ex be in the same situation? If you’d like to find out, I’ve got you covered. I made a list of 15 signs your ex regrets dumping you.
Don’t get your hopes too high, though. If you messed up really bad, they might not regret dumping you at all, like in Nocherie’s case: “No regrets. He cheated before we got married.”
Are you ready to find out the truth? Read further if you are!
15 Signs Your Ex Regrets Dumping You
1. They still expect the privileges of being with you
Dumper’s regret is easy to identify if your ex does the following things:
- They expect you to help them out when they need it
- They want to stay in touch with you and hear about your day
- He or she requires your attention for various reasons
What really happens is your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend realizes that they miss the intimacy they shared with you.
They also miss the little things, such as you telling them about your day, good morning and good night texts, and so on.
This realization makes them regret that they can’t have all that anymore.
2. They want to know if you’ve started dating
When your ex-partner asks you if you’ve started dating, don’t be fooled. They don’t ask out of curiosity only. He or she is, in fact, trying to find out whether you’re moving on or not.
“Why would they care?” you might ask yourself. Well… that’s exactly the point. They shouldn’t care if they didn’t regret the breakup.
At this point, your ex might realize that they made a mistake when they dumped you. So, naturally, they want to find out if there’s any way of getting you back.
Finding out that you’re not seeing other people yet could encourage him or her to pursue you once again.
3. They bring up memories that you two shared
Another really obvious sign your ex-partner regrets splitting up with you is when they start thinking and talking about the past.
It’s so obvious because of the following reasons:
- You are no longer part of their everyday life like they’re used to and they can’t adapt
- They miss you and they have no present memories to hold on to because of “no contact”
- Their mind is creating a form of you that’s still part of their life by remembering old times
On top of that, your ex could ask you if you miss them. Do you know why? Because deep down, they want you to miss them because they regret ending things with you.
4. They tell you they regret the breakup and apologize
If, out of the blue, you get an apology message from him or her, brace yourself!
The reality of the breakup probably just hit them and now all they want is to take your pain away and stop feeling it as well.
They could do this by bombing you with sincere apologies, and by pretty much putting all the blame on themselves.
While that may not be necessarily true, because they’re filled with remorse, they prefer to take full responsibility for everything that went wrong between the two of you and also for dumping you.
Maybe your ex won’t go as far as taking all the blame. However, if they apologize and admit their faults, you know what that means.
5. They find excuses to interact with you constantly
Your ex feels remorse if they keep finding excuses to interact with you. No matter how harmless and innocent his or her excuses are, there is a hidden motive.
You are on their mind and they want to talk to you and see you, but they know you might not respond unless they give you a good reason.
That’s why they might tell you things like…
… Did I leave my external battery at your place? I can’t seem to find it anywhere.
… Your favorite band is coming to town. I thought you’d like to know.
… I ran into Jordan (a mutual friend) today. Did you know he’s getting married?
… I’m sick… Can you please help me? I need cough medicine.
… I found your wireless headphones. Would you like to come by and get them?
6. They showcase a renewed romantic interest in you
Feeling deep remorse can determine people to act in different ways, including in romantic ways. To be more precise, your ex could try to start all over with you.
They might ignore the fact that they dumped you and change their attitude for the better. How?
- Your ex could express curiosity about you
- He or she could flirt with you or tease you
- They could buy things for you or surprise you
- Your ex might talk about your past together
- They could make other romantic gestures
If they do all of these, it means they know they made a mistake to break up with you and they’re sorry for their decision.
7. They contact you often and act in a caring way
Pay attention to this sign because it’s surprising! Regret could manifest in your ex in an entirely unexpected way: He or she may try to redeem himself or herself by showing more affection than ever.
You see, he or she feels guilty for causing you pain. They know that the breakup made you suffer emotionally and they hate the fact that they’re to blame.
So because of that, they might try to care for you and be more affectionate with you than they ever were.
By doing so, your ex-partner is trying to compensate for the fact they hurt you and behaved in a bad manner with you.
8. They still watch your stories and react to your posts
Your ex-partner’s tendency to… stalk you is a sign! It indicates they’re far from being over you and that they might be sorry for breaking up with you.
Think about it for a second… Why else would they still spend time watching your stories and following your social media activity?
They wouldn’t, I’m telling you. I was the dumper at some point in my life and I wasn’t sorry for splitting up with that guy. I immediately unfriended and unfollowed him. I couldn’t care less what he was doing.
The conclusion? Only those who regret what they did look back. That’s why they’re still looking and reacting. They want to draw your attention.
9. They are trying to make amends for their wrongdoings
Is he or she showing any signs they wish they hadn’t broken up with you? Yes, they are if they’re trying to atone for past mistakes.
In this regard, there are numerous possibilities. Maybe they didn’t prioritize spending time with you. Or, maybe they were never there to help you out.
Either way, they’ll think about their mistakes and try to fix them. Even if it’s post-breakup, the remorse they’re feeling pushes them to make amends.
So, take any attempt to show you they’re sorry and want to make it up to you as a sign.
Here’s what you should expect:
- He or she will apologize sincerely
- Their behavior will noticeably change
- They will try to make amends
- They will find ways to show their commitment
10. They are more considerate of you and generous too
I mentioned before that if your ex-partner changes his or her behavior for the better, it’s a sign they’re trying to make it up for something.
In your case, that something could be the fact that they dumped you. If so, it means they’re sorry for doing so and they’re expressing it by being more considerate.
On top of that, they could become more generous with their time and money when it comes to you.
Do they suddenly care about your needs and feelings? If they do, it’s a sign they regret breaking up with you.
11. They make changes and do things just to impress you
Earlier, I told you about a time when I felt absolutely no remorse for dumping someone. Well, now it’s time for you to hear about what I did when I regretted splitting ways with someone else.
Apart from apologizing and expressing my desire to get back with him (which he wasn’t interested in), I also improved my look and did things to impress him, such as:
- I opted for a new hairstyle and I lost a few pounds as well
- I started to send him little gifts and leave him sweet DMs
- I invited him to do various activities I knew he loves
- I kept in close touch with his friends and met them casually
Anything goes, really. Especially if your ex changes something about them that you always asked them to change, that’s meant for you to notice!
12. They called you while drunk more than once
Drunk calling or texting counts as a sign because that’s when he or she is vulnerable and more prone to opening up about their real feelings.
I know that getting such a call or text can flip your world upside down again. And while you might be tempted to think it’s nonsense, it actually isn’t.
You should hear them out if they contact you in an altered state because that’s when they’ll tell you the truth.
How so? Alcohol has a relaxing effect on humans and it makes them more open to sharing things that they would otherwise hide.
13. They don’t seem to be recovering after the breakup
Look, your ex might not show any of the above signs. However, if they’re clearly in bad shape and the breakup has affected their life for the worst, that’s also a sign!
His or her inability to recover from the split could point to regret. Maybe ending things with you turned out to be different compared to what they expected.
Or, maybe they dumped you for all the wrong reasons and they think there’s no way they could make it up to you.
How can you tell for sure? Here are a few ways:
- They ask your friends about you
- They start drinking or using drugs
- They engage in destructive behaviors
- They try to talk to you as much as possible
14. They bump into you when you least expect them
Bumping into your ex once could be a coincidence. But bumping into them twice or more? That can’t be random.
Unless you think that some higher force is bringing you two together and that you’re actually meant to be together with him or her, you have to face the truth:
He or she is stalking you. Or, maybe they’re just going to places where they know you usually hang out. That’s a sort of stalking as well and it reads desperation all over it.
Feelings of regret and love can determine people to act in obsessive ways.
15. They still haven’t started dating long after the breakup
According to a survey done in 2017, people need about 6 months to move on from a breakup. Of course, everyone is different and some might need more time, while others might need less.
However, if your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend seems stuck, romantically speaking, even after a longer time than that, then you’re right to assume they regret dumping you.
The simple fact that they haven’t started dating anyone else after the breakup could mean that they’re not ready.
Why aren’t they ready? They’re not over you.
What to do to make your ex regret dumping you?
Let’s talk about the steps you could take to make them regret ending things with you:
- Apply the no-contact rule
The no-contact rule implies cutting off all contact with your ex. It’s a very effective get-your-ex-back technique because it gives them the motivation to pursue you.
With its help, you can make your ex-partner realize what it really means to live a life without you. The less available you are to them, the more they’ll want you back.
- Focus on your self-improvement
Focusing on your self-improvement is not only going to help you become a better person, but it’s also going to make you look highly desirable to your ex.
Ultimately, there’s no better way of getting back at your ex for dumping you than showing him or her that you’re doing great and living your best life.
In this regard, focus on your well-being, take care of yourself, spend time with friends, pick up hobbies that make you happy, and so on.
- Do things to keep them guessing
Your ex knows you quite well… After all, you were in a relationship a short/long while back. So, to make them question their decision to dump you, you could try to be unpredictable.
In other words, try to do the opposite of what they might expect. Also, don’t keep sharing everything you do and feel with them. Maintain a little mystery.
You should also refrain from chasing them any longer. When they notice you stopped, they might chase after you.
By now you should know for sure whether your ex regrets ending things with you.
If they do, and you want them back, then you should have a heart-to-heart conversation with them and make a plan to work on your differences and reconcile.
However, if you don’t want them back, then know that it’s okay to reject their attempts of talking to you or making amends.
You should focus on your own healing and let them deal with their feelings without your help.
No signs of remorse? You were either not a good fit for each other or things were unfixable between the two of you.