Foreplay is amazing! It helps to drive physical intimacy, which in turn creates an emotional connection and increases sexual pleasure. You might be thinking to yourself, “I know this.” Yet, despite this awareness, some lovers don’t take their time with foreplay and head straight to the finish line. So what can be a possible aid for a partner in such a difficult spot? One word… sexting.
Sexting is a word that often is synonymous with teenagers. But you would be surprised about how little teens engage in sexting, compared to adults. In fact, The American Psychological Association reported that only 1 percent of teens sext, while 18 percent of adults, ages 18-35 are typing away. Sexting can be an important part of your sexual life and a great way to express one’s innermost sexual thoughts, wants and needs effectively.
For those who feel a sense of insecurity with in-person foreplay and/or just interpersonal communication during intimacy, sexting can be a huge help. If you and your partner are watching TV together, and you both have your phones on, you can sext him/her a sexy thought. That’s a turn on and the start of emotional communication and intimacy. It says to your partner, I am thinking about you and desiring you. You can always start with flirty messages and see how it goes.
Here are 4 helpful tips on sexting:
- Sext your lover when you are next to him/her in bed. That would come as a hot surprise! But don’t limit your sexting to there. By sexting at work, the store, wherever, you are creating and revving up your sexual engines. You’re letting your partner know you desire them. You’re furthering the emotional attachment that some have a difficult time expressing or creating in-person.
- Don’t hold back with sexting. Sext your lover about your most intimate sexual thoughts and desires. Sext him/her about sexual positions you want to try or what sexual acts you want to do to him/her when you come home from work.This can be a comfortable way to let him/her know what you would enjoy.
- For something bold and exciting, try to role play in your sexts with your lover or send sexy photos. Have some fun moving outside of your comfort zone and get yourself pumped.
- Discover your lover’s passions through sexting. Ask your partner what he/she would want done to them. Find out about his/her sexual fantasies. This openness will not only bring you closer but will help you become a better lover.
Sexting can be a fun and comfortable way to communicate your deepest sexual fantasies behind the safety of a mobile device. It can help to kindle a fire and explore your sexual desires with your partner. So, pick up your phone, pull up your partner’s number and give it a try — you never know what you’ll discover.
Article written by Paul Blount, MSW, Relationup Advisor, @theloveadvisorx
Contribution by: Sara Barthol, MSW